Chaps - in my line of work we need to keep an eye on these things -
thought you should know.

Euro announcement

The European Union commissioners have announced that an agreement has
reached to adopt English as the preferred language for European
communications, rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British government conceded that
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five-year
plan for what will be known as EuroEnglish (Euro for short).

In the first year, “s” will be used instead of the soft “c”.
sivil servants will resieve this news with joy. Also, the hard “c”
be replased with “k”. Not only will this klear up konfusion, but
typewriters kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year,when the
troublesome “ph” will be replaced by “f”. This will make words like
“fotograf” 20 per sent shorter. In the third year, publik akseptanse of
the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more
changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double
letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al
wil agre that the horible mes of silent "e"s in the languag is
and they would go.

By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing
by “z” and “w” by " v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary “o” kan be
from vords kontaining “ou”, and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to
ozer kombinations of leters.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in
forst place.