Tried cleans first but had nothing, as in nothing, off the floor. So skipped that and just did BP –
225 for 1,2,3
Could have done more but I have to watch my nerves. I get fried easily and this weight is enough to zap me if I’m not careful.
I like the ladder idea and we’ll see if my body likes it. The reps were slow as molasses though. I had no speed at all and didn’t even feel like I was able to attempt to move fast, like I could only move so fast (slow) and that’s it. I’ll have to include some explosive-type thing that doesn’t eat into my energy or CNS. Med ball throws come to mind.
Oh, yeah, the leg feels just a little – the word soft comes to mind – from the last bend which is not unusual. I thought I might not be able to squat today and that was the case. Strength and ROM are both muy importante so I’ll probably alternate, doing one hard bend and one good squat or DL each week. More than that would be asking too much from both the leg and my nerves. I am aaaaaaaaaalllllllllll used up after a bend and a little flat the next day.
Next one is
Friday – UB and squats if my leg feels right for it.
Screwed up my sleeping so am flat today. I thought I’d do a ladder w/ 235 but no – 2 singles of that were all I had. Nerves feel frayed from bad sleep. I really need to have some damn discipline and focus regarding sleep. I bagged squats since my coordination is off and I’ve hurt myself before that way.
One positive thing is that I used my last warmup to fire a fast one w/ 205 and that went up all right.
I need to pick up some washers or something next time I’m at Home Depot since 10 lb. jumps seem too much.
I could say that things derailed me this week but that would be crap. I allowed things to mess me up. I can and will schedule and plan training such that I do what need to do physically regardless of what else ensues.
Today was a prime example. I didn’t have much energy left after other stuff so just worked up to a single w/ 245. I really need to keep up my frequency since I lose things so quickly.
I realized tonight that I was starting to do exactly what I knew I’d want to and said I wouldn’t so I won’t: go down the rabbit hole of a bigger bench. 245 is enough, or at least it isn’t a glaring weakness. I need to not use any energy or focus or time on anything other than the essentials.
Tonight was one set of below parallel squats with – wait for it – a whopping 95. It’s a new movement really doing them again and the knee was feeling it. I’ll evaluate tomorrow but I think I can increase that along with bending aggressively. Quad strength, bend angle, mobility/agility and stairs are what needs attention now, and lots of it.
I don’t mean to sound sappy, but I’d like to tell you, “Good job, and keep it up.”
I can only guess how taking so long to recover from an injury feels, but you’re doing very well and you need to just keep on plugging. Things will get better.
In theory I should be completely better by now. And I should be, because even though the injury and surgery gutted my energy, I have not taken care of my business the way I need to. I do some hard work but also slack too much and don’t do everything I need to do. I’ve been doing some of it and hoping for the rest to just come. I am running out of time before I have to move so I am going to be pushing it harder this week and continuing.
One thing I realized is that progress is bogus. Progress is something I’ve used to mask failure for way too long. It does not matter that there is progress, that I do everything better now than even 2 months ago – that is BS. What matters is: am I there? If not then I’m not there and need to work more. I’ve tracked progress and told myself I was doing better. Which I have been, but if success is coming that slowly it’s really failing.
Hard bend. Not sure if I got to new territory. I cut it a little short to be less tooled tomorrow. I need to accelarate the rehab greatly. I’ve got to push it. I realize I sound like I contradicted myself but hard hard days take way too much out of me.
I am focusing very specifically on one important aspect this week. I really think it is a major key. This will get [SIZE=“7”]done this week.[/SIZE]
Also, Feldenkrais is essential. So is foam rolling. So is stretching. These are things that will help me move a lot better without too much of a hit on my limited recovery abilty. I’ve been slacking major on all of these. I however have very limited ability to focus on tasks so in the real world, epsom salt baths will have to do the job of these for the most part. Ideal? No. But what I can really do? Yes. It is not the best possible way, but it is the best way possible.
Tonight was short range high rep max effort partials supersetted with iso holds.
That was the James Smith version of: I pushed my car across the street. Broke down. First assessment is distributor.
Life sucks, I suck, everything sucks, and I realize that my mood is darkened by my lack of fish oil. I’ll attack this hard but first I need to chill a bit.
It’s a damn good thing this didn’t happen yesterday when I was way up in the middle of nowhere. So much to prepare for, so much to do.
I’m getting booted from my place soon and winter is coming. I hated hated hated last winter which was looooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnggggggggggggggg and miserable. I’ve been thinking about going to Thailand. I want to go somewhere that’s cheap, warm, interesting and not highly stressful. Research continues.
Started to squat but I could feel the nerves and energy taking a hit probably due to bad sleep. I’ll sleep early and lift something Friday. I’ll need to blow off steam after work, which even when people aren’t asshats is still a big load on the nerves.
I think I will stick to the singles thing since I feel less tooled afterward and that’s important for all the stuff I have to do, like cleaning out the basement.
Fell awkwardly and hard today. I’m hoping I didn’t wreck myself but the tendon is super tender and sore and hurts to move 6 hours later. Ibuprofen and ice plus rest and easy easy massage eased the pain somewhat but it’s majorly hard to walk.
Got lucky – the tendon seems mostly fine except it’s a little stiff and sharp jolts hurt. I had to walk very slowly this weekend but I was able to do a lot of walking without problems.
Knee was super stff and sore today due to all the walking but it was mostly good until 10 minutes ago when I stepped on something awkwardly and I mean boy that hurt.
I’m no good, physically as well as every other way.
I thought I was making progress but now --??
I suck and I’m seeing more and more that there is no point. Plus I see no point to this journal – no one will ever gain anything from my rehab experience and there’s no other reason for keeping it. So this may be the last. Thanks to those who offered suggestions on rehabbing.
Knee is sore and super sensitive to any sudden jolt. I’m going to go do some BP and whatnot since I feel my lack of lifting souring my already bad mood.
I invented a lift that I’m about to try out. If I ever find a damn camera cable I’ll post a video.
Upon hearing of the passing of Charlie Francis I thought I’d mention what his work has meant to me.
I’m a juggler and have trained diligently for many years. When I read Speed Trap, it was a revelation. Many concepts I had struggled with and phenomena I had experienced but didn’t understand were suddenly made clear. His methods of training and coaching changed the way I trained myself and taught others.
When I came across these forums I was amazed at the depth of understanding and breadth of experience Charlie brought to any topic. Many of his posts changed the way I thought about an issue. Charlie could show the way to a much deeper understanding with just a few words. In the midst of a particularly arcane discussion which had gotten mired in molecular biology, Charlie simply asked, “How does this affect your training choices?”. The minutia faded away like smoke and I have been less concerned with trivia ever since.
I will never read CFTS the same way now. It’s hard to think that a man with so much to offer is lost to us. I never knew him, but from his writings it is clear that we of the sport world have lost one of the greatest minds of this or any other time.
I haven’t been here in a while. I see that I didn’t log my hill sprints here. Those were part of my knee rehab journey and I see most of that was logged elsewhere. I still have work to do, grr. I think I’m going to stop logging at place #3, not sure if I want to log my w/o efforts at all these days. My journals are as much a chronicle of mental health struggles as training, but current training goals are knee ROM, leg strength and fat loss. I don’t have any specific lifts or times I want to reach these days, just be healthy and move better.
Skimming some of my entries from 2005 I want to yell at that guy and tell him to wake up. I remember 2005, both how unhappy I was and how oblivious I was. I was heading for a cliff, literally, and I didn’t see it or think about it. I didn’t understand. There were very important things about myself and my life that i had no idea about. I try to remind myself that it’s always that time, that I always have to deal with reality, not try to escape into my thoughts. So many things could have been done at that time. So many things I have to do now. I could have saved myself so much anguish. I understand things better now and that’s good but it also brings more suffering since I see my life more clearly.
Journal’s are a great way to see patterns. A training journal is a good way to keep yourself accountable. Public journals are a bit personal in my opinion. The entire point of a journal is to add everything you can think of that influences training. It’s part of the problem with how people view training. It’s about this lift or that rep… So many aspects of our daily living influence training.
By the way, welcome.
I try to think of mental health as BRAIN HEALTH.
I have been looking into TRAINING HEALTH lately. How athletes think they are so healthy because they train hard and training is ‘good’. Masters athletes are particularly interesting. I used to think training hard was the most important aspect of my performance. Thinking we know something is a bigger issue than admitting how little we actually know.